insanezenmistress wrote:
Logic is many layered and does not account for things of emotion and does not draw connections between the weather on a certin day as the means of attaining some kind of mental liberation. Logic cannot understand why Epihphanies tend to come on the tails of some subjective experiences that is entirely unrealated to the problem solved.
Example: your an inventor and you sat many days working out an idea that just isnt going to come for you. You take a rest. Weeks later a child falls off his bike and in your witnessing of that event your mind snaps to attention and you find your long sought for logical solution.
Perhaps you haven't studied all there is to study in psychology. I have not studied too much psychology, either, but I have formally studied human feelings and behaviour on the micro and macro levels. What you say here is perfectly logical so far as I can see. It has happened so many times to so many people under so many different circumtances across time, culture, and geography--it's one of those things that just is. A law of nature if you will. There are psychological reasons that can be explained on the biological level if I'm not mistaken. You might want to take a look at
this for starters. Here's one about
Michael Persinger who is doing this research.
It is also a law of nature that when people act on their instincts driven by these inner motivations that sometimes they lose contact with their better human knowledge or common sense. Then they give in to fear or whatever and hurt people who disagree with them. When I am overwhelmed with fear and fantasies, I need to fall back on solid logic. That has carried me through when all else failed.
Logic looks at what exists in
this world in
this moment for
this need.
For example, I may be overwhelmed with the death of a loved one, the loss of a long-time job, and the notice that I need to move--all within one short month's time (this specific list of things has never happened to me personally but it could). And then notice that both my fridge and wallet got emptied out while I wasn't looking--probably legitimately but I was too busy and preoccupied to keep tab on everything. Nor do I have a bus ticket to go to the bank to get cash. What to do???
Should I pray and wait for God to move a neighbour to put food or a cheque on my doorstep? That would be one option but it would be awfully risky and I could starve in the meantime. Except my neighbours might discover that something was wrong and they might actually help out. Should I give God the glory at that point? Sure, that would be one option.
Logic tells me those are not my only options, or the wisest options.
1. I can walk to the grocery store so not having a bus ticket is not an excuse.
2. I can buy groceries with my debit card; I don't need cash in my wallet.
3. My grocery store allows customers to get cash back on their debit cards so having no cash in my wallet and no bus tickets in no excuse whatsoever not to go grocery shopping.
But I'm having so many other problems I can't even think about grocery shopping. This is where cold hard logic has to step in and say, "You haven't eaten all day. There's crackers and one wrinkled apple on the countertop. Eat that. Then go grocery shopping, whether or not you feel like it. Then you will be better able to focus on the bigger picture."
Sometimes I have to break it down into even smaller segments and figure out how to get out of the chair I'm lounged in and how I'm going to combine the eating of a wrinkled old apple with dry crackers.
That is on a very literal level for a very micro-level or small-picture need. On the big-picture level I was desperately unhappy. I'd followed all the advice anyone could give me and nothing worked. I'd done my homework. I did my research. The only way to get where I needed to go was through formal education. To do that I had to openly disobey the religious rules of my parents and faith community. The consequences could be excommunication.
After weighing all my options I decided to try secrecy. I registered for one course and didn't tell my people what I was doing. Over a course of ten years I:
*discovered that education was the way for me to go so I came out of the closet
*left the church I was born into
*moved out of the community
*finished one degree and started another
*found a place to live in town
*deconverted from Christianity
*looked at paganism but it wasn't right
*found exChristian.net and identified as agnostic
*learned to know some atheists and found they were really decent people
*found out one can be atheist without denying existence of God
*found article to the effect that god begins and ends in human psyche; had already suspected as much
*tentatively accepted label atheist; still not really comfortable with it but it's the only thing that honestly describes my theological position
*finished a second university degree
Okay, one can't pack ten years into a bulleted list. But this shows you that focusing on the step ahead is what kept me grounded in some major, far-reaching, and over-whelming life decisions that had the potential to sweep me off my feet into oblivion. I thought at the time it was God leading me but I was looking at literal items working together to make it possible to arrange my work schedule so I could attend class secretly. I got my class schedule a few days before my work schedule so it worked out.
I hadn't a clue in the world how I would pay for it because my community pays women waayyyyy below minimum wages so, although I had worked up to 90-hour weeks, I had no money. Someone donated a large sum of money to the school and this was offered to me to pay tuition for thirty courses. So it went from one literal step to another, with me arranging rides from one class to the next. Either I hitched up my own horse and traveled for two hours by horse and bus to school, or I arranged to ride with someone else. For four years I patched together rides in this way.
Did God do this for me? It sure felt like the energy came out of my own brain and body. And the persecution--the dozens of angry letters, telephone calls, and confrontations I got after I left the church--did Jesus bear those stripes? It felt very much like I bore them my own self with my own psyche.
However, the relief--the new birth or epiphany--I experienced when I made the decision to leave the church was so enormous that I was able to bear it. Just when I thought I could bear it no more, friends came out of the woodwork. Also, the letters let up. And then school started and I had lots of friends there who were willing to listen to me and support me. I had intentionally waited to come out until I had established a new community. It was such a wise plan.
The funny thing is, these things happen with just as great regularity now that I am an atheist as they did before. My decisions happen the exact same way now as they did before. It's a balance of feeling and logic. As I have said before, NOBODY AND NOTHING IS WORTHY OF WORSHIP IN MY BOOK.